Let marriage be a choice !!

This is my first article guys so please bear with me until i improve my way of writing !!

Let me first tell you why i choose this segment!

Im a 20 year old girl and i have chosen two professional courses namely CA and CS along with my Bcom degree! These courses usually take around 7-8 years to be completed together which implies that i would be around 25-26 while completing them and my parents especially my mother is so worried that if im too much educated, its hard to find a groom for me. My mother wants me to get married when im around 24-25 and wants me to have a family of my own. This is something every parent wishes for their daughter. My parents think that marriage is the only protection for a women, which is obviously wrong! 

But here comes the contradiction, i am a misogamist and i really wanna stay single, become financially independent, accomplish all my goals and lead a life for myself without getting married!

I wondered, is it just me feeling this way, hence i did some research. Sorry if this is too long.

According to the study by the Pew research centre in the year 2023, around half of the US women have reported that marriage is not necessary for a fulfilling life. I personally think women stay single not because they failed to find a partner, but because they wanted to stay single and discover the purpose of their life and live without any external validation. The responsibilities imposed on a women after marriage is literally suffocating and overwhelming to be honest. I personally think there would be a drastic change in the lives of women after marriage in many cases.

Is marriage really the only protection for women? Does this mean that all married women are safe and secured??

In India, around 32 percent of married women between the age of 18-49 have reported some form of sexual and domestic violence. I can go on and give multiple statistical references of how much women have been affected after getting married.   ( this doesnt mean men aren’t affected, im here talking only about what women go through )

Lets talk about a different perspective right now.

After getting married, women are supposed to get consent or approval from their husbands for every single thing but does the same happen with men? I dont see men seeking consent from their wives before making any decisions in most of the cases. In most of the cases and not all cases.

So why are only women expected to do such things? 

A women is expected to leave her own house after marriage, adapt to the new environment physically and also mentally, adapt their lives according to the preferences of their new family, change their food habits, change the way they dress up, do household chores etc. But what changes are expected from men after marriage? They are certainly expected to earn, but earning is not a responsibility created by marriage alone. Let me be clear, I'm not saying men don't have any responsibilities other than earning, I just wanna talk about the WOMEN snags.

Right here im blaming the society and my criticism is towards the society on how it expects a women to change just because of getting married.

But imagine what if a women decides not to get married and stay single?? I dont have to change myself for anybody. I can do whatever i want and whenever i want and live on my own terms. I dont have to reshape myself according to anyone's expectations. 

Women should be taught to live alone and not be dependent on anyone, they should be taught that marriage is not the only protection. 

Another thing which keeps pissing me off is that people saying its hard to find a groom when the girl is more qualified or educated. How the heck does this matter seriously? Shouldn't the husband be proud that his wife is highly educated? I've seen SOME MEN saying it hurts their ego and makes them feel inferior. But if men are more qualified than the women doesn’t that have the potential to make the women feel inferior?  But no, no one talks about this because its just implied that men are always superior which is a mere assumption by the society.

You just cannot blindly say that one would make you feel inferior just because they are more qualified than you.

A healthy relationship must be built on mutual love and respect, not competition or ego.

What im implying here is, it should never be mandatory either for women or men to get married. None should never look down upon people who haven’t married or treat them differently or judge them for not getting married or force them to get married. Not getting married should be seen and regarded as something common and usual and not as a blunder.

Thanks for reading 🫶